September 28, 2005

Room 101

In a recent dinner table discussion, the following were suggested as things people would like to put into Room 101:


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September 27, 2005

Wedgie

What's the most discreet remedy for a wedgie?

It's for umm...let's say, scientific research...

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September 24, 2005

Jaffa Cakes

My youngest sister was doing her homework the other day; a project on cakes for Home Economics..Cookery...How to Microwave Ready Meals 101 or whatever they call that class these days. She was making a list of the different type of cakes one can consume and caused quite a stir when she wanted to write in Jaffa cakes.

"They're not a cake, they're a biscuit!" was the cry to be heard around the room.

Of course, I had to correct them all and told them the story of when McVities took on the mighty Customs & Excise to prove that Jaffa cakes are in fact a cake and not a chocolate covered biscuit for VAT purposes. A thrilling tale involving 12" Jaffa cakes and zero-rated goods. I mean you'd be enthralled if I told you this story surely? You see no reason why my entire family feigned yawns and snores right? Thought as much.

Whilst we're on the subject, here are some more unusual items that are VAT exempt. And they say us accountants are boring.

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September 16, 2005

Sylvanian Families

841.jpg I got my foot on the first rung of the ladder! I'm now the proud parent of White Mouse twin babies. I've named them Molly and Matty. Eeeeeeh.

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September 13, 2005

Autobiography

My sisters say that if I ever write an autiobiography, I should call it "I Fell Asleep". Apparently, it's my catchphrase.

What would your autobiography be called?

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September 11, 2005

The Many Faces of Minesweeper

minesweeper.GIF

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September 9, 2005

Bíum Bíum Bambaló

My Audioscrobbler list is becoming one big "it's not mine, honest!" a la Austin Powers moment thanks to my lil' sister's music sessions while I'm at work.

Earlier, I was listening to Kashmir by Led Zeppelin when someone said, "Oh my God, someone covered that Puff Daddy song?!" I almost rushed upon my sword-shaped letter opener. (By the way, you can't buy Led Zeppelin tracks on iTunes...whaaa?)

Talking of music (which I'm doing a lot of lately) you must must must listen to Bíum Bíum Bambaló by Sigur Rós. It's from the soundtrack of an Icelandic film called Englar alheimsins (Angels of the Universe). I don't care how you get listen to it, sell your soul to Bill Gates if need be. Find it, love it, thank me. This track is going to blow you away, unless of course I've hyped it up so much that it disappoints in which case you have permission to kick my butt.

Oh, and if you really cannot get hold of it, tell me and I'll personally burn it onto a CD for you and send it your way. It's that good.

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September 7, 2005

Walthamstow's Finest

I am not ashamed (though I probably should be) to say that I was an East 17 fan back in the day where being an East 17 fan didn't get your head kicked in. Yep, I had large posters of Tony Mortimer and Brian Harvey up in my room, even a couple of small ones of Bill and Bob (or whatever the other two were called). Mum of course knew of the fascination, being subjected to their music all the time. I even blasted it in the kitchen when she was trying to teach me how to make chapattis.

East 17 broke up in 1997 and I was sad for, oh, about a day. My musical tastes have changed, you'll be pleased to know. (Some would argue that liking the Backstreet Boys isn't much of a progression but boo sucks to them.) Mum however isn't quite up to speed with the goings ons in the pop world (apparently she has better things to do with her time. Poor excuse, I know.) Whenever I'm listening to something that happens to have a male voice, mum chimes in, "Is this East 17?" To name but a few, she has asked me this whilst I've been listening to the following: Seal, 112, Maroon 5 and Notorious BIG.

I don't mind of course, I just gently tell her that no, it's not the boys from Walthamstow.

The last straw however was the other day when I was listening to Franz Ferdinand. "Is this East 17?"

"Mum! East 17 have been been gone for over eight years now! No this is not East 17....I don't listen to them anymore! They weren't that great a band in the first place; that is such an insult to this music!"

"Okay, okay, baba.....is it Take That?"

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September 6, 2005

Cold-oy-vey

I listened to Parachutes and X&Y back to back last night and wooooah *waves arms in air, pretending to be a set of scales therefore signalling that Parachutes far outweighs X&Y and that Coldplay should really pull their socks up*

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September 5, 2005

YS Chronicles - Fat Troosers

Younger Sister: Those trousers are waaay to big for you. It's like you're wearing your dad's......and that your dad's fat.

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September 4, 2005

HELLO? I'm the in library

What's worse than ringtones? When people want you to hear all the 'fabulous' ringtones on their mobile phone they have so play them to you, one by painful one. Bring back the simple "ring ring".

On a related note: I'd like to personally thank the creator of the Crazy Frog ringtone for totally ruining the end of Nina Simone's "Feeling Good" for me, one of my all time favourite songs. I shall have to console myself with Muse's version for the next three hours now.

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September 1, 2005

A woo hoo

COMMENTS ARE WORKING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It seems it WAS my host playing silly beggars. Nice of them to finally reply to my pachillionth support request and admit that it was a problem with them and not the permissions on my CGI scripts.

So what does this all mean? Now you can write about all those burning issues that you've been storing up for six months, comment on all the highly interesting things I've been writing about and just generally tell me how much you love me. That's always nice.

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