I am a Saimarai, waaaaaaaaah.
I love babies. Love them to bits. Rumour has it that I even used to be one.
There's a helicopter hovering above our house. So I waved at it. They didn't wave back. I was angry. Then I realised even if they did, I wouldn't be able to tell. Relief that maybe the world isn't full of impolite police helicopter passengers after all.
Oh thank goodness. I thought I was suffering alone.
I often wonder about you reader. I wonder who you are, what your name is if you're using a pseudonym. I wonder how old you are and where you're from. I wonder what you do for a living and what car you drive. I wonder what your family is like and what you look like. I wonder who you fancy and what you think about cloning. But most importantly I wonder what your favourite ice cream flavour is.
So tell me. Tell me all.
And the award for worst song lyrics goes to.....
Shakira for Whenever, Wherever. Something was definitely lost in the translation.
Close runners up:
I'm back from my dirty weekend in Glasgow. It snowed. We had a white Eid. More details won't follow. Short sentences are fun.
Talking of short, Ant and Dec would be my celebrity lovers.
How many different ways and times can you use the line 'The first rule about Fight Club is you don't talk about Fight Club'? Well, I'll tell you. A pachillion, and they get less and less funny as time goes on.
I was thinking about how sorry I feel for employees of Deloitte & Touche. I mean that's one of the Big Five Firms. So you're thinking "Hey, I'm cool, I'm hip, I'm rolling in the big dollars baby!" (Although that would be rather unfortunate 'cos you're in England). And so someone asks you what job you do etc. "Hey I'm cool, I'm hip, I'm rolling in the big dollars at Deloitte & Touche!" "Where?" comes the reply. Exactly, that's the only one people don't know about! You don't feel so cool and hip no mo'. You should have taken the job at Ernst and Young. And stop using cool and hip, that's so 1995.
Busy busy bumblebee. I get to stand in front of the chemistry department and my peers tomorrow and talk about cyanohydrins. I'm just so excited! You're right, I'm being sarcastic.
On an unrelated note, visit Hasan. Not many people can pull off humour and vulgarity with such style.
This site seems defunct in terms of representing me. I don't say half of the stuff I really want to say, I feel I can't show the real me. Even my surfing habits are different from those reflected here. The design pisses me off. I need a remedy.
Wooh, over a week since my last post. I was ill guv'nor. And to show how sick I still am, today in the laboratory we had to do an experiment where me measured our pulse. I was the only one who didn't have one. No pulse, just noise on the graph which led to the following noise. "She's dead!" "You really are ill!" A late arrival adds, "You look like shit". Bastards.
So I didn't win an AntiBloggie. You know whose fault that is don't you? Yes, Simon's. I'm thinking from now on, anything that goes wrong can and will be blamed on him. Let's see how that pans out.....
Brainy quote as opposed to plain old 'do we even care what you have to say you silly eejit' quote.
I've seen many 'baby blogs' and most of them just freak me out. Mums and dads speaking in some weird third person malarkey. But this one actually held my attention for a while. Nicely put together and a cute baby to boot. Not that I'm saying boot the baby or anything.....argh, more antibiotics please.
I'm sick of reading about 'the phenomenon of weblogs/blogs'. Yeah, they exist. Yeah, they're great. Yeah, they're easy. Get over it and blog.
Yesterday I won second prize in a beauty contest, went to jail, bought half of London's West End and demolished about seven houses with just my fingers. Monopoly is way too much fun.
I've been working on another web project, that coupled with MSc application forms and laboratory work has kept me away from posting here. But never fear, I'm not neglecting you, oh no.
Black and white photography. Reminds me, I still have a black and white film with nothing worthy of photographing.
Well this feature 'How to seem smarter' could certainly help in a lot of situations. Apart from like if you're being trampled to death by an elephant or something....
For my birthday, my sister bought me 'The Weakest Link' game. With the game you receive a set of cards with sarcastic remarks and put downs! That happens to be my favourite part of the show. Here's a selection of them.
Radio Silence (2)
Sif: I'm not old, I'll box y...
Saima: Mighty Boosh rocks! The...
Published Photographer - No doubt! (4)
Saima: I'd say vlookups are a ...
Sif: Not sure I thanked you ...
London to New York (4)
Sif: Yeah, it's for real, yo...
Anisa: It was me that showed M...
Fifth Element love (0)
The Four Ws (0)
Live Manta Birth (0)
Hogwarth's school opening (0)
Rihanna sells out... (0)
Blair's big adventure (0)
The Tate Moodern (0)
Tall folk wanted (0)
Islamic women priests (0)
Rise of London (0)
SaimaSays.com and the Saima Says logos are licensed under a Creative Commons License. This includes all content, design and images. If you steal my stuff, bad things will happen to you in this life and the next.
Taking this site or me seriously will ultimately lead to social disorder and the disintergration of reality as we know it. Also, llamas may begin to rule the world. I like llamas. (Though I suggest you take the copyright notice seriously.)
I cannot be held responsible for the pure drivel on this site. It is usually written under the influence of chocolate and my love for llamas.